School Sports Reflection: Play to Learn

December 7, 2018

By Christopher Mundy
Special for benchmarks 

Christopher Mundy is a graduate of Manton High School and Michigan State University and the principal of Mundy Advisors Group in Chicago. This commentary previously was published this summer in the Traverse City Record-Eagle.

What are sports really about today? And are today's parents missing the point? Time, money, effort and energy. All for what? Trophies, medals, first place, a college scholarship or that top-five draft pick and that multi-million dollar contract that come with it. Fortune and fame? 

Why does American society have such an obsession with sports, and are the true values of the games being lost in the “new” modern era of sports?

What if the games kids played were for the pure values of competition, hard work, camaraderie, trust, respect, discipline, communication and relationship building? Even just expressing these words and phrases seems healthier than the win-at-all-cost, everyone-gets-a-trophy, playing for the “end game” society we currently live in.

What messages are we instilling/infusing in our future leaders? It has become a strong and consistent message across all fronts – the arms race to be the best and win at all costs.

Families sacrificing their most precious resources, time and money, for what? For the golden child, the chosen child ... that special one. A glimmer of hope that becomes a burning obsession (for the parent). Are parents attempting to right their wrongs of their playing days or relive their youth through their child? It is an easy and complex trap. 

I don’t have children, but I have played sports for nearly 40 years. I have coached, officiated, watched and listened closely at all levels. A spectator with an intense passion for the lessons to learn and a strong curiosity of why and how. I guess at 45 I am old ... or maybe just old-school.

Being raised on an isolated farm in Northern Michigan with a dirt driveway and a makeshift basketball hoop created the love affair with sports. Games of pig, horse or around-the-world with my father are some of my fondest memories. He has since passed. He would always shoot with his off-hand or easy bunny shots to finish me off. And Dad always told me, if you want to play in the fourth quarter, be a 90-percent free-throw shooter and the coach has to put you in.

Baseball would entail games of rain on the roof by myself and a homemade batting tee to hit home runs into the pasture. Football was either offense-defense (three-person football, with my father as quarterback) against my older sister or breakaway running plays against my aggressive dogs; a stiff-arm was my best defense. No video games or cable television on our farm, maybe this fueled my fire or forced my hand. It sure did not make friends want to come over for sleepovers. 

Small town America was a great place to be raised. I am biased in that regard. I do think it takes a village to raise a child. Sports was and is the fiber of these communities; it was reality TV before reality TV, and what Friday Night Lights was based on. Kids playing a game for a common goal. It could not be more simple or pure. They are called “games” for a reason. When did we start taking it so seriously? Where did we go wrong? 

In high school, we were pretty good. You put kids together since kindergarten and they kind of know and trust each other, they know each other’s strengths and weaknesses. They know more than this. They know each other’s families. And extended families. They pretty much know everything about each other. Which family is broken and which one may have a little more love at their dinner table. Good or bad, this is the reality of being raised in a small town.

Our basketball team was so good we received a top-five ranking, and legendary Detroit Free Press writer Mick McCabe compared us to Hickory, Indiana, in the movie “Hoosiers.” No Hollywood ending for Manton in 1991 though.

This is where the lessons of sports become real; the harsh reality of your childhood fantasies begin to fade, and fade quickly. The hours spent in that driveway will lead to no state championships. The early morning trips to the gym to play against your adult coaches would lead to no college scholarships. And the thousands of hours in the weight room lifting, jumping rope and wearing ankle weights would lead to no multi-million dollar contract. Devastating. Crushing. The end?

No. This is just the beginning. 

This is the beginning of life’s toughest lessons being learned. This is where the sweat of your youth meets the tears of maturity, leading to a wisdom that is worth more than any trophy. Maturity is processing these challenging life lessons, learning from them and moving on. If you do not let go of these failures, the burdens can lead you to a life of regret or maybe becoming that aggressive parent trying correct his or her shortcomings through a son or daughter. You know these parents from your kid's games, and I hope you are not one of them.

It has often been stated more is learned from losing than winning. The lessons from failure burn deep, etched into our soul, this pain more powerful than the glory of victory. These lessons and scenarios easily translate to our personal relationships and work life. Memorable. Powerful anecdotes that become part of us. Part of or history. Part of our story. Erase these chapters from our lives, and what are we left with? A shell of a person. A half-written book. A journey half-walked. Perspective with no depth.

These kinds of lessons can’t be learned in a textbook, cannot be explained by a parent or modeled by a teacher in a classroom. The field, the court, the rink is where these lessons are learned. Where family values are refined. Manners are taught. And respect is earned.

Or is it?

This is the crossroads we are at as a society.  I cannot think of any other vehicle that offers so much potential and opportunity for the building of character. It starts with the family. And where does it go from there? School, church, a job. The military. A fraternity. Volunteering? An internship or apprenticeship? A civic organization?

Nope. Sports.

Sports is the most dynamic and able tool to build character. The kind of character we need right now as a country and society. Polished. Refined. Character with a sharp edge. An edge called courage. But the reality is sports has become about money, power and control. Are these qualities desirable? Have they corrupted the innocence of sports? Do we worship false idols? Is this generation entitled? Have we given them too much? Made it to easy?

Are the kids having fun? What do the kids want? Do kids have and show a genuine passion for a sport? Have we dared to ask them? Have we prepped them with the appropriate answer? Or do we answer for them? Do we hear them OR do we listen to them? To clarify, listening is an active process of hearing and then processing. Coach Tom Izzo starts each basketball camp with, “Learn to listen ... and listen to learn.” It is that simple.

I do think communication is vital to this process. Communication between all parties: athletic directors, coaches, parents and players. Governing bodies. All stakeholders. A real and raw dialogue on what we collectively want out of sports. Because somehow we have gotten lost, and the many headlines and feature stories confirm the crossroads where we’ve arrived.

Do we as leaders, adults, parents care enough to look into the mirror and ask the tough questions? Or is it just easier to proceed as is?  If you believe sports has a larger impact than trophies, medals and ribbons, a larger value than money, then I encourage you to start the conversation with those around you. Our communities’ futures depend on these conversations.

We may soon reach a point of no return, and this would be a catastrophic failure for our generation. When playing for the “love of the game” is just a marketing tagline and not a real opportunity for our kids. For our children’s sake, I hope this is not the case. I know I am a better athlete, better professional and better human from all the losses in my life.

Play hard. Play to compete. Play with passion. Play to learn.

Leadership: A Skill that can be Taught

January 30, 2013

By Jed Blanton
MSU Institute for the Study of Youth Sports

At the MHSAA and the ISYS, in the milieu of work we conduct centered on understanding and developing leadership in young athletes, there is one definition that seems to govern our approach and serve as a foundation for the research questions and training clinics that follow it.

Penned by Peter Northouse, that definition states “leadership is a process, whereby an individual influences a group of individuals to achieve a common goal.”

Choosing to frame ‘leadership’ as a process, rather than as some personality characteristic destined only for those naturally-born leaders, allows the concept of leadership to be utilized and taught as a skill, or set of skills. If a coach can agree with the philosophy that leadership can be learned, we can begin to design a series of strategies to enhance leadership in our young athletes.  

First, I’m going to discuss what most coaches already know about teaching skills. Teaching skills is essentially an effort of behavior modification. A coach sometimes is able to choose athletes who already possess a certain level of competency within the skills necessary for their sport; sometimes coaches must work with whoever shows up on the first day of practice.

In either case, coaches tend to conduct a subconscious assessment of skills that must be learned (that they must teach), whether complex strategies or mere fundamentals. When teaching athletic skills to young people, coaches must break down the multitude of steps involved.

Think about a lay-up in basketball or the high jump in track & field. Either skill itself is actually a combination of several skills, and the ability to pay attention to very specific cues in the environment. Coaches teach the approach, the proper hand/arm placement, the essential cues to focus on, and the follow-through. Coaches can devote segments or entire practices to particular skills – breaking down all the steps, creating drills to practice the steps, and offering the full practice of the skill in a competition-like environment.

During this episode of developing a skill in our athletes, to get them to perform in a very specific way, our interactions often mirror what behavioral psychology has known for decades: People respond to reinforcements and punishments. Coaches positively reinforce their athletes with compliments, clapping hands, and congratulations. Our words and actions shape how the individual learning the skill makes adjustments to receive more praise.

These shifts of their body and miniscule changes in their actions to get to the desired behavior of their instructor are “learning.” Similarly, coaches often threaten punishment of extra sprints or difficult drills to give athletes a clue as to what behaviors they should avoid. Often, something as simple as a disapproving glance can be reinforcing enough to change whatever behavior the athlete shouldn’t be practicing. The simple “good job” or the threat of sprints essentially shapes how our athletes behave athletically.

This same approach can work toward leadership development.

What would it look like for a coach to reinforce and punish athletes toward leadership development in the same vein they develop athletic skills? If coaches could determine what three or four behaviors they’d like their athlete leaders to showcase, and then positively reinforce those skills with compliments and thanks, and potentially punish athletes with disapproving glances or even lectures after practice, leadership can be learned like any other athletic skill.

Phil Jackson, the multiple championship-winning NBA coach, has been quoted saying he would try to give two compliments for every criticism with his professional teams. The Positive Coaching Alliance – a national nonprofit organization that strives to educate coaches on ways to enhance the youth sport experience – suggests a ratio of five positive comments to every negative criticism. Research has consistently shown that people respond better and more rapidly to positive reinforcement than to punishment.

All too often, coaches wait for leaders to emerge, rather than teach the leadership they desire. Imagine if coaches waited for players to figure out the offensive plays and strategies instead of teaching players where to move, how to move, and why they are moving there. Adopting a similar approach with your athlete has the potential to expedite the behaviors you’d most ideally want them to possess. Using tactics of positive reinforcement can help these young players to become excellent leaders in a shorter period of time than merely hoping someone steps up.

I’ll leave you with a simple list of suggestions of how coaches can teach leadership, just like they teach any other necessary athletic skill.

  1. Develop goals with your athletes regarding leadership. What kinds of things do your athletes value or feel would help the team? How can they practice leading their teammates in that way?
  2. Develop your own goals toward teaching leadership. What would it look like if a coach made it a goal to compliment three players on specific leadership behaviors each practice? Think about the ultimate team captain for your team, and develop strategies to teach your players how to be that captain.
  3. Break down leadership skills into smaller and easier to practice chunks, just like an athletic skill. Then create an environment where the athletes can practice these skills. By organizing your team into smaller groups, or even partners, you can assign leadership roles within each group. Asking certain players to lead various parts of practice (stretches, lay-ups, circuit training), you are giving them a sense of ownership over their athletic experiences and responsibility over their teammates.
  4. Positively reinforce the desired behaviors. How would it make a player feel if their coach pulled them aside and thanked them for their specific leadership behavior after a practice or game? A “job well done” or an approving thank you can go a long way in making a young athlete feel they are developing into the leader you desire them to be.


Blanton is a doctoral candidate at Michigan State University in the department of Kinesiology, specializing in the PsychoSocial Aspects of Sport and Physical Activity, and a research assistant for MSU's Institute for the Study of Youth Sports. He has served as a facilitator at MHSAA Captains Clinics the last three years and currently is assisting the association with its student leadership programs.