NFHS Voice: Lessons Learned in Loss
January 31, 2020
By Karissa Niehoff
NFHS Executive Director
Sometimes in life things simply do not happen as planned. The unexpected is always right around the corner. When these situations occur, we must adapt to change and determine the best steps in moving forward.
Such was the case in selecting the subject for this week’s “Voice.” We were set on addressing the ugly spotlight on professional baseball with the recent sign-stealing incidents and that high school sports is not and must not be about “winning at any cost.”
This is certainly a worthy subject. High school sports is about competing fairly and doing things the right way. The wrong in the baseball scandal was not getting caught; it was players and managers believing that cheating was an acceptable means to winning. These are not the kind of heroes we want to follow.
And then came the events of Sunday morning in California. It was hard to fathom. Kobe Bryant and his 13-year-old daughter, Gianna, were no longer with us. Along with seven others on the helicopter that crashed that morning, Kobe and “Gigi” were on their way to what else – a basketball game.
As people from all over the world – both those who knew Kobe on a personal basis as well as casual fans – expressed their shock and sadness about this tragedy, there were consistent messages about the value of sports and family that were ever present.
While Kobe Bryant was one of the best basketball players ever to play the game, it was apparent that more so than all the all-star appearances and scoring titles and NBA championships, his impact came from the relationships formed through participating in sports – from Lower Merion High School in the Philadelphia suburb of Ardmore, Pennsylvania, to his 20 years with the Los Angeles Lakers.
And then it was about family as he supported his daughters, Natalia, who plays volleyball, and Gigi, a basketball player who was determined someday to play at the University of Connecticut, in their participation in sports. In an interview with PEOPLE Magazine in 2018, Bryant shared how he used his opportunity to coach his daughters in basketball as an opportunity to teach them valuable life lessons.
“A valuable life lesson that I can teach them is what it means to pursue excellence and the commitment level that comes with that,” Bryant said in the PEOPLE interview.
There are many lessons to be learned from this tragedy and the nine lives that were cut short. Our original plan of re-emphasizing that high school sports must not be about “winning at any cost” is certainly among those lessons. Success at the high school level has more to do with preparing students for their lives after high school than winning games or state championships.
Doing things the right way, playing the game the way it is supposed to be played, developing relationships and having fun along the way – that’s the message of high school sports.
As we listened to hundreds of people share their remembrances of Kobe Bryant the past few days, a few things were evident. Like all of us, he was not perfect; however, he showed us the power and influence of sports in our country. He played the game the right way, giving 100-percent effort every night. He regularly praised and supported others, always smiling. And he was passing on his love of sports to his daughters.
And the last lesson – be sure you tell those closest to you every day that you love them.
Dr. Karissa L. Niehoff is in her second year as executive director of the National Federation of State High School Associations (NFHS) in Indianapolis, Indiana. She is the first female to head the national leadership organization for high school athletics and performing arts activities and the sixth full-time executive director of the NFHS, which celebrated its 100th year of service during the 2018-19 school year. She previously was executive director of the Connecticut Association of Schools-Connecticut Interscholastic Athletic Conference for seven years.
Pandemic Planning: Creating a Schedule
December 15, 2020
By Stacy Leatherwood Cannon, M.D.
Henry Ford Health System
With coronavirus continuing to grab headlines and physical distancing orders still in place, every day tends to feel the same.
More parents than ever are working from home, have reduced hours or may even be out of work due to the pandemic. Those who are working at full capacity may feel the strain of trying to balance work and childcare. Many schools and extracurricular programs have been moved online or canceled.
With both parents and kids feeling the stress of new daily routines, it's more important than ever to create a schedule that all family members can follow.
Staying On Schedule
When schedules are off (particularly sleep schedules), children and teens may be at greater risk for depression and anxiety. Younger children may act out because they have increased energy with no outlet. The good news: Creating a schedule — and sticking with it — can help everyone feel more grounded.
Children thrive with an understanding of the daily routine. Knowing what to expect and what they need to do reduces anxiety and helps kids feel more in control.
A few ways to achieve an effective schedule:
• Make it a family affair: Instead of drawing up a schedule and expecting everyone to stick to it, involve your children in the process. Call a family meeting where you come up with sleep and waking times, mealtimes and breaks. Kids are more likely to embrace a new schedule if they played a hand in creating it.
• Enforce bedtime: Children doing remote learning may not have to rise as early to make it to school on time. Even so, it's important to set a regular bedtime so they can remain on task during daylight hours. Your best bet: Establish a bedtime routine that includes calming activities (like a bath and reading) and ensure your children go to bed at an appropriate hour. School-aged kids should get about 9 to 10 hours of sleep each night.
• Stick to mealtimes: Keeping mealtime consistent allows for a structured break where kids and parents can reconnect and troubleshoot when necessary. This is especially important with older adolescents who may work independently during the school day. Unfortunately, what works for one family member may not work for another. Ideally, families should work together to establish mealtimes, then adjust based on each individual's needs and assignments.
• Encourage breaks: Kids and adults alike become zombie-like after sitting in front of a screen for extended periods. For children who are distance learning, frequent breaks are especially important. The younger the child is, the more breaks they need to stay engaged. That said, even older kids should take breaks every 30 minutes or so to walk around, get a snack and do some simple stretches. Better yet, take your breaks together and do some jumping jacks or share a snack as a family.
Successful Scheduling
Coming up with an effective schedule that the whole family can follow is not something you do at the last minute. Plan for the week ahead over the weekend. Sit down as a family and discuss what worked — and what didn't — the previous week. Then tweak as necessary.
Most important, be patient. These are unprecedented times for all of us. And while we have months of experience dealing with this pandemic, transitioning back to school has brought new challenges.
Try to shift your focus toward the perks of this experience. This is a rare moment in history when families can come together and spend a lot of quality time together. It could be a time of growth and transformation for your whole family.
Concerned about how your children are managing the pandemic? Help is available. To find a doctor or pediatrician at Henry Ford, visit henryford.com or call 1-800-HENRYFORD (436-7936).
Stacy Leatherwood Cannon, M.D., is a board-certified pediatrician and the physician champion for childhood wellness for Henry Ford LiveWell. She sees patients at Henry Ford Medical Centers in midtown Detroit and Sterling Heights. Learn more about Dr. Leatherwood Cannon
PHOTO: Novi's Abigail Pheiffer, a senior on the MHSAA Student Advisory Council, gets in some wall sits during a break in her day.