Holding Back

February 24, 2015

I wrote last week in this space about the positive place for disagreement in organizations; and I held back on pushing the topic a bit further.

Sometimes an organization leader has to hold back. Sometimes the leader needs to recognize that the organization has more disagreement than it can handle and that taking on another topic for which much disagreement is likely would be like drinking from a fire hose.

In Leadership on the Line (HBS, 2002), authors Ronald Heifetz and Marty Linsky write that “leadership requires disturbing people – but at a rate they can absorb.”

Heifetz and Linsky describe the need to “orchestrate the conflict” in four steps:

  1. “Create a holding environment” – a safe place to interact.
  2. “Control the temperature” – turn the heat up to get people’s attention, and turn it down for them to cool off or to catch up.
  3. “Set the pace” – not too fast that we leave too many people behind; not too slow that we lose the vision and momentum.
  4. “Show the future” – remind people of the “orienting value” – that is, the positive reason to go through all the negative rancor.

Anniversary Celebration

May 9, 2017

Mixing work and family obligations is not recommended for marital bliss; and I’ve done pretty well over the years at not taking my work home to the extent that my family felt like the second team. However, once a year I insist that my wife comes to work with me. That was last Saturday night.

The Michigan High School Athletic Association’s Officials Awards & Alumni Banquet occurs each May, just about the time I should be considering a nice night out for my wife as we celebrate our wedding anniversary and Mother’s Day. So, one might think I am asking for trouble by making this event our big night out.

Yet it works. For if there is one thing the Officials Banquet demonstrates, it’s the power of partners and family.

Time after time last Saturday evening, officials thanked spouses for their support. For keeping late dinners hot and uniforms clean, of course; but also for savoring the stories that sports officials have so many of and share so vividly.

Officials know what it means to have a partner, and to have his or her back in good times and bad.

Officials are a part of a big family of people with affinity for one another that often grows into deep and abiding, lifelong affection.

It wasn’t just longevity that was applauded last Saturday; partners and extended families were honored as well. Not a bad way to celebrate a 45th wedding anniversary.